When Cows Fly by Emerald News

Emerald City News

Our newest reporter Dan Deerborn describes how cattle rustling is alive and well in 2085, with an eye-witness photo and an interview from an anonymous source present at the scene.

Date: 10/2/2085 By: Dan Deerborn

You've heard of light milk, but have you ever heard of flying cows? This reporter recently did. I first learned of the cattle theft from a hiker who snapped a photo of the cow-napped bovine floating over a chain fence. We've included the photo to see the odd sight for yourself. Unfortunately, the hiker heard bullets around the same time and hightailed it to safety. The hiker is now in hiding and wishes to remain anonymous for safety reasons after his apartment was tossed and his PAN hacked then wiped. We imagine they might be looking for the photo, but we got to it first. They will play merry hell trying to scrub it now that it is on the Emerald News Inter-Host File System and replicated across thousands of hosts. "Who are the oft-cited they?", you ask? I think we both know the answer to that chummer. It's the trip-A corporations, or rather the power brokers who control them. Free-spirits, Dragons, AIs, wealthy mages - we'll dive more into who's pulling the strings in Seattle in our piece coming out next month "Seattle's Seedy Side - the Puppetmasters".

We found out the farm's owners are LL Farming, a little-known farming corporation with a large number of mages on the payroll and a large turnover in animals being experimented on, if the dead animals disposed of are any indication. We were unable to trace who owns LL, but you can bet it's a much bigger corporation.

Here it is in the hiker's words, voice distorted for their protection. <<Attachment(MPEGXXV,audio-only): "I was minding my business in the woods, tending my, uh, herbs. I decided to take a break and hiked a half hour or so; then I heard a large screech like ripping metal and bullets going off. Next thing I know, I see in the distance a cow floating over a field toward the fence. Since I was still far away, I zoomed in to the max and snapped a pic of it. Then some bullets came near where I was, and I ran. I've been in hiding since, but I needed the money. Do I get paid now?">>

Afterward, we managed to track down another eyewitness who took part in the battle. We traced him to Montreal and found him nursing his sorrows and a broken arm with a bottle of gin. He had a dire need for a shave and an even worse need for a shower. But he told his story once we got him talking. He'd been hired as a low-level mage to perform rituals on cows and summon spirits. He shuddered and started to shut down when we asked about the rituals, so we moved on. He told us everything was going fine. Some runners had attacked them a few weeks before and ran away, tail between their legs. Then, these other runners showed up. "First, I knew something was off when my ward around the cows went down. They'd already taken out two watchers I had set as well, watchers. I sent my air spirit (I'm good with those), and it gets immediately disrupted.", he said.

Before continuing, he took a long pull of gin straight from the bottle. "I don't have much in my kit, but I'm good with spirits. So I summoned another one. This one takes longer, but they take it down, too. We also had a crazy lady in armor distracting our guards while all this was happening. She ripped the fence apart and stood arguing with us like some cyber-singularity Karen. Then, when stuff got real, she went and broke my arm in two places. I must have passed out from the pain because the next thing I knew, I was waking up under a desk. The very next day, arm in a cast, I'm told I am getting shipped to Mexico, where I can make one final contribution. I managed to break out and have been running since. Thanks &$&%-hat, by the way. If you tracked me here they can't be far behind, I got to get out of here."

As far as we can tell, the LL farm is still going strong; they seem to have several more cows. A friendly AI recently uncovered some LL records that indicate a preponderance of blood mages. You know what that means, chummers. Aztechnology is around. We haven't determined if they own the farm or are just working with them. Either it is bad news indeed.

Emerald City News is your source for news from the shadows - we're here for what they don't want you to hear.

Note: This news refers to the events of the CooksAssistant run that occurred on 19 SEP