Captain Cook Gets Got

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Revision as of 05:16, 26 April 2024 by Ellehog (talk | contribs) (Created page with "{{NewsHeader| |Image= |ImageSizeOverride= |Date=25 April 2085 |NewsSource=Fennec's Stream |Reporter=Fennec |Metaplot=None |Intro= }} “Hi hi, KuroFennec Deeeeeeeeeeeeesu! Wanna see something funny, chat? That's right! We're back with covering stuff that's happening for the first time in a little bit! Smashcut!" A tail slaps the camera, sending the viewpoint spinning into a clip stolen from a security feed looking at a restaurant. A fight spills out from Captain Cook's...")
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Fennec's Stream

Date: 25 April 2085 By: Fennec


“Hi hi, KuroFennec Deeeeeeeeeeeeesu! Wanna see something funny, chat? That's right! We're back with covering stuff that's happening for the first time in a little bit! Smashcut!"

A tail slaps the camera, sending the viewpoint spinning into a clip stolen from a security feed looking at a restaurant. A fight spills out from Captain Cook's Seafood into the street, with a few frightened civilians fleeing while a car pulls up, three more men jumping out to join the brawl. The foxgirl streamer jabbers over the top of the footage. "Check it out! A bar fight! Perfectly normal, right? Well, it's a Cutters-owned place - you can tell by the colors those guys are wearing, they're members and they're diving in to help out their buddies. But watch closer!" Out of the bar spill a few more people - then there's a rush out of the door, trails of sickly green smoke following the crowd out. "That stuff looks nasty!"

"Now, apparently nobody got hurt, but the cops came to investigate the place after! Looks like soooomebody was cooking more than fish in this place! Ugh, no pride in their work though." A proud group of Knight Errant officers stand over the remnants of a very amateur drug cook - dirty glassware, product left sitting out, and there's a half eaten sandwich sitting by one of the burners.

"I know what you're thinking, chat. 'Why is this something that your glorious matrix fox goddess Fennec-sama would cover?' Well! Simple! This isn't an accident or a bar brawl! It's aaaactually a very sneaky action by one of the Cutters greatest enemies. That's right... the big A is behind this. Aztechnology!" Laughter follows - both from the fox and from the chat that's mocking her. "Nah, nah, I'm messing with you. But like, this totally reads to me like somebody's trying to heat things up between these guys! It's totally embarrassing to get gassed out of your own restaurant and arrested by the cops you paid off - oh yeah, here's some receipts from KE's databases if you're curious about how much that costs, chat." Beat. "... What? No, I'm not explaining how I got that! It's time for us to play more Miracle Shooter! Now, I have a couple subs who got guaranteed spots for hitting the highest tier sub last month..."

And the stream moves on from the "news."


(Reporting on events related to https://shreloaded.net/wiki/Captain_Cook%27s_Magic_Book .)

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