Pound Personell Shatter Christmas Morning Calm
Horizon Seattle News, 06:00 25-12-2080
An attractive oni reporter's face appears, smiling prettily
"This Christmas morning was shattered by two Bellevue Pound workers causing chaos through central Seattle. The two workers, Gerald and Ferdinand Humphrey, left for a pickup early this morning, before going on a drunken rampage, stealing Christmas trees and gifts, while leaving dangerous animals in their wake. They were caught by the diligent Knight Errant investigative team, who caught the two men in Redmond, after their rampage took them through Bellevue, The Madrid Dome, up to Fremont, and then to where they crashed their government vehicle in Redmond."
A map appears, detailing the convoluted path the pound truck had taken, as well as a clip of the 4-ton truck driving along the wall of a road tunnel
"It is unknown as yet whether there was any cause beyond the two men's drunken state, but they are expected to be deemed fully responsible for the 6.4 million nuyen of property damages and trauma recompense their escapades caused, due to causing a Dome lock-down, Ramming a border checkpoint, and instigating a major traffic accident in the Everett tunnel."
"Furthermore, The men released several dangerous creatures throughout Seattle, causing seven deaths, and several dozen injuries. They are expected to stand trial for these cases of manslaughter later in the week."
"The Bellevue Pound issued a statement that all the escaped animals have been safely recovered, and the streets of Seattle are safe for Christmas morning."